Ok. Please bear with me as I attempt to deal with this in tasteful fashion.
Thursday morning found me comfortably seated at a public loo. I had just settled in with the sports section, when the small still quiet of the room was interrupted with,…. well……troubling sounds. I am not referring to the masked sounds associated with the perfunctory courtesy flush. No no, this was laboured breathing. A huffing and puffing very much along the lines of the three little pigs….. I am going to blow your house down.
Initially my sensibilities were wounded, as I felt a kindred spirit had decided to ignore one of the basic rules of toilet etiquette. However, two pages ( a wonderful article on Landon Donovan) into things, I began to fear for the health of the poor fellow (who was thankfully) two stalls down. What does one do you ask?
Well being a civilized gentleman, I promptly evacuated the premises, and alerted the authorities via 911. Some have suggested a more hands approach, but you must understand that any sort of personal intervention would be poorly looked upon.
I am not saying that my actions were heroic, but perhaps I saved a life that day.